Tuesday, February 11, 2014

What about this year?

I kind of never talked about goals and such for the coming year...

Boy, what high expectations I had a year ago - finish one craft kit every week.  The reality doesn't quite fit that bill.  With 23 projects finished, I'd really like to continue to work on only what I have (and LOVE) and maybe show off some other projects.  I've only cracked the craft kit box open and there are plenty of small and large projects available in there.  And I'd like to continue to give away those kits or crafty pursuits that no longer bring me joy. 
I only decreased the craft supply/hoard by one bin (but it was a big one - 96 Liters big) and would hope to decrease by another bin in the next year, whether its yarn or papercrafts or needle arts that I work with, it all needs to dwindle.  When we moved into our house 10 years ago, I had one small craft bin with a lot of miscellaneous stuff and one cross stitch kit.  It has really grown in the past 10 years.  I think my purchasing had a lot to do with discontent with working so much, not knowing what to do with myself since it was the first time in quite a few years that I wasn't going to school and unrealistic expectations of what could be done in what time frame.  I think this last year was a bit of self-discovery and I'm still working on that journey (aren't we all?).  But the fact that I can put the reasons in writing why I've acquired so much really gives me power over my actions in the future.  

Really figuring out the common sense thing that if I want to add something to my life (like a job, or a new hobby) means I have to take something out (an old hobby, a personal responsibility around the house) has been quite life altering.  I mean, it is common sense, but it wasn't until I read how another person gave up their hobby/passion and occupation of photography (and all of the detritus that comes with that) so they could pursue another passion and job of teaching, did it really kick in.  

I've been clearing out other things in my life (watching Hoarders on Tuesday nights, really helps me clean stuff out on Wednesdays!)  and only recently figured out  something that was holding me back.  I wanted to display some glass candle holders that I inherited from my grandma.  But I had to move something that was already on display - a cowboy hat candle I received when I was 5 years old from a friend that was moving from the house across the street to Texas (from Ohio) and 2 Korean dolls that I received from 2 little girls I tutored in English when I was in college.  I was afraid to get rid of these items, because I am afraid that if I let go of these items, then other people (mainly my kids) won't know who I am or was. This is also how I feel about doing so many crafty things.  I want to leave tangible evidence that I was here, in this world (and that I accomplished something in this world). 

 I know this is an unfounded fear and that I can tell my life story and life is about moments and not things...blah, blah, blah... I've heard it and read it a million times in all the simplifying/minimalist things that I've read.  It's easy to read the idea that "by owning less, we would draw more attention to the most important" and "our minds would be more free to create new memories in the future"  But it's a lot harder to deal with this emotion and emotional things when it's happening to me.   (quotes from Clutterfree with Kids by Joshua Becker, chapter 9)  

Again, recognizing the feelings is the first way to deal and overcome them.  I also, more importantly, don't want my things to be a burden to others - I want others (especially my kids) to feel a freedom to go forward to do what they want with their lives and not feel like they have to keep something because I gave it to them.  With that being said, I hope to really take a look at what will be a benefit to me and my family in the future and make decisions from that standpoint.  

So no specific goals, just more of a look at the world from a different perspective and, always, continuing to decrease the craft hoard by doing what I enjoy most.

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